Today I discovered a “friend” – someone I respect and have to interact with – betrayed (sorta) me. This person questioned my integrity and made a few jokes about me. I hate to be “dramatic” but I really was crushed. I know – I am 35, not 16, so maybe it shouldn’t have been such a big deal. But, it was.
So, when the clock turned 5:45, I was in no mood to go to our care group’s get together. I am a pretty good faker, though, so I thought I’d give it go. Besides, it was a pool party, so my kids really wanted to go. I am so glad I went. In addition to my new Hefty Smurf (thanks, Valerie!),my friend Angie gave me a card, book, and CD.
It was just what I needed – and God knew it. I looked at the book and talked to her about it a bit, but I didn’t read the card or listen to the CD until I got home. I can’t quite articulate how much all three mean to me. God knew…he knew I’d be in a “I am giving up; it’s not worth it” mood. And, what did He send me through my friend? Psalm 37 and a reminder about whom I serve.
My CD had the song “Choose” by Christy Nockels on it. (Read the lyrics below– my new anthem:)!) Angie had also written Psalm 37:5 on the CD and placed a note about why Christy and Nathan Nockels had written the song. So, I Googled Psalm 37 to read the context of 37:5: “Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this.” One read through this Psalm, and I was overwhelmed with God saying, “let it go, Sarah. It’s on (person who betrayed me), not you. Pray for ____ and rest in Me.” (See Psalm 37:8:)
I was overwhelmed by how Angie’s words fit my current situation, so I texted her and asked if I could share some of her words with you. After explaining a tough decision she once made, Angie wrote, “God was showing me that my foundation needed to rest in Him alone. He needed to teach me to give complete control over to Him. I think that will take my lifetime to learn:) He was teaching me that at times I need to ‘let go, and let God’” She then shared Hebrews 12: 1-2: “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus.”
Tonight, I am choosing to embrace God’s message through Angie. (And, if you know me well, you know that I want nothing more than to confront the person and throw a mini fit!) But, no way. I will commit my way to the Lord, throw off everything that hinders what I KNOW God has called me to do, and fix my eyes on Jesus. Moreover, I will pray the words of Christy Nockels’ song: “Let me be in love with what you love, let me most satisfied in you, forsaking what this world has offered me, I choose to be in love with you.”
There’s no way my friend knew the impact of her song or her words, but God did. He sent me what I needed, when I needed it. If you’ve had a God moment like this recently, I pray you’d share it as a comment. It’s so encouraging to see how He’s at work in our lives. And, if you’re struggling with betrayal, I encourage you to seek Him before you confront the person. While I am choosing not to confront the person, you may need to, but before you do, please pray and prepare your heart. Choose to be in love with Him and show his love to others.
The book Angie gave me: Breathe